Author: StephanieBBlake

I love to help others focus on the one thing that's most important in life through my ministry, teaching and writing. As Vice President of Xtend Ministries International - www.xtendinternational.com, I travel extensively with my husband. I maintain two websites: www.onefocusministries.com and stretchmoney.wordpress.com. On the One Focus site, you can find free Bible studies, devotionals and information about my first book, "The Prayer Driven Life". My book, "Money: How to Be Rich Without It and How to Stretch It Using Ten Hints from the Past and the Technology of Today" was the inspiration for stretchmoney.wordpress.com. Money saving hints are contained throughout the book and this site was created to continue to give helpful hints on stretching money or having the proper view toward money.
One Focus Blog

Deadly Words

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I remember when I was in grade school and some child was being bullied and was brave enough to say to the bully, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” In trying to get the other child (or group of children) to stop, the bullied child was trying to imply that their taunts were not getting anywhere.

WikibullyWe now know those poor children were wrong. Words can hurt you. Not only can they, but countless numbers have been so adversely affected that the damage to their self-esteem lasted for a lifetime. Withdrawal and depression often result from being bullied in the past.

The most serious consequence for this callous behavior has been suicide. New words have even been created for this terrible outbreak. “Bullycide” refers to a suicide committed as a result of being bullied. Cyberbullying is so prevalent that new laws and policies are constantly being developed to try to control it.

Statistics are staggering. At the time of this writing, nearly 30 percent of students are bullies or victims of bullying, bully victims are between 2 to 9 times more likely to commit suicide than non-victims and in Britain at least half of suicides among young people were related to bullying.

Relationships have been crushed and lives have been destroyed because of words. Even in America, where the law clearly states that one is innocent until proven guilty, the mere accusation of a crime can ruin a life.

The Bible is full of warning about this very thing. The verses that have to do with our controlling our tongue – our speech – are abundant throughout scripture. Once when I did a detailed study of Proverbs. I was taken with the number of references to the words of the wicked.

Jesus was on the receiving end of this kind of evil. He was human and I am certain those words hurt. His bullies eventually had Him hung on a cross. For your sake and for mine, He allowed this to happen so that we could be with Him someday where words will never hurt us.

Jesus said,” Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted and by your words you will be condemned (Matthew 12:34-37).

One Focus Blog

The Owners of the Instruments

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My husband and I once had lunch in the home of two lovely young ladies who use their musical gifts in the church where we were working. These ladies had left their home countries to come to Vienna so they could study with the best teachers to help them sharpen their skills on their instruments. It took a lot of sacrifice for them to get accepted into their schools. They and their family were also sacrificing a great deal to keep them there. God miraculously provided for them. They were honoring Him with their lives and their gifts.

706px-Philippe_Mercier_-_The_Sense_of_Hearing_-_Google_Art_ProjectIn junior high school I played viola and then violin in our orchestra. When I moved, there was not an orchestra in the next school. There was only a band. So I didn’t continue with violin lessons, but I had played long enough to know how very difficult it is to get a good sound out of the instrument. I had just gotten past the squealing stage when I had to quit.

These sweet girls played the violin and the cello. They had purchased what they could afford. Their instruments were not the best. Neither were the bows. The violin player even laughingly described the crookedness in her bow. I can attest to the fact that these girls made beautiful music come out of those instruments. They told us others had tried to play their instruments but always complained stating they didn’t know how these girls are able to play with them. The girls admitted that the music was not the same when others tried to use their instruments.

The Touch of the Master’s Hand by Myra Brooks Welch is a well-known poem that describes an auction where the bid for an old violin increased one thousand fold after an old man came to the front and played a sweet melody on it. The difference was the touch of the master’s hand.

In the case of my two friends, the master’s touch was so intimate that each of them was the only person who could make beautiful music come out of what others considered an inferior instrument.

I belong to Jesus. In His hands I can be an instrument of usefulness – but only in His hands.

for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure (Philippians 2:13).

One Focus Blog

The Three Dimensional Life

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Eleanor_Roosevelt_and_Human_Rights_DeclarationEleanor Roosevelt was a remarkable woman – dedicated to her husband, her country and public service. She wrote several books, but when she wrote You Learn by Living, Eleven Keys for a Fulfilling Lifeas at the age of seventy-six, she had acquired experiences that enabled her to give good advice for those who want to live a full life. The high premium she placed on learning is a great example for us all.

She was very honest in her assessment of herself. She shared many instances of how others taught her the value of learning, but an example (in her first chapter) of an adjustment in her own thinking set the pattern for the rest of the book.

“Perhaps the most essential thing for a continuing education is to develop the capacity to know what you see and to understand what it means…As an example, many years ago the Consumers League asked me to check on conditions in department stores. I made my report. it was valueless.

“But,” I was asked,”do these women have any stools to sit on behind the counter when they are not waiting on customers or must they stand all day?”

For years I had gone to departments stores, I have seen women behind counters. It never occurred to me that perhaps they could never sit down and rest. I hadn’t looked….

When I began – so slowly – actually to look around me and to try to understand the meaning of what I saw, everything I encountered became more interesting and more valuable. It was like a two-dimensional picture seen in three dimensions, with depth.”

This was not the last time Mrs. Roosevelt mentioned questions that made her think. She learned by listening and looking.

Mrs. Roosevelt did not indicate that she was talking about a lack of spiritual eyes, ears and understanding, but her example reminded me of Jesus speaking of people who have eyes, but cannot see and ears but cannot hear. That would, I believe, present the two-dimensional picture that Mrs. Roosevelt described. We live in a three dimensional world, but we can ignore a lot of it. Depth of living and learning comes from observing the world – as much as possible – from God’s perspective.

And Jesus, aware of this, said to them, “Why do you discuss the fact that you have no bread? Do you not yet see or understand? Do you have a hardened heart? Having eyes, do you not see? And having ears, do you not hear? And do you not remember, when I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many baskets full of broken pieces you picked up?” They said to Him, “Twelve.” When I broke the seven for the four thousand, how many large baskets full of broken pieces did you pick up?” And they said to Him, “Seven.” And He was saying to them, “Do you not yet understand?” (Mark 8:17-21).

Reflective Focus

Think on These Things

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For as he thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7 NKJV).

The Mind

Without the ability to think, none of us could function. Our bodies work because our brains tell them what to do although those who do not have control over their bodies can be productive if the thought processing part of the brain is still there. ALS or Lou Gehrig’s disease, for instance, is a neurodegenerative disease affecting nerve cells in the brain and the spinal cord. When motor neurons die, the ability of the brain to control muscle movement is lost. Patients in latter stages may become completely paralyzed. Eventually the disease leads to death.

Shortly after his 21st birthday, Stephen Hawking was diagnosed with ALS and given two years to live. Although he cannot speak and is bound to a wheelchair, he has been living with ALS for fifty years. Touted as one of the most brilliant theoretical physicists in history, he says his life is very satisfying. Stephen Hawking’s brain is diseased, but he still has the ability to think.

Much has been debated about the condition of being brain dead (not to be confused with living in a vegetative state), but in many places, brain death is a legal indicator of death. A person who is brain dead has no hope of recovery or survival. All brain activity may have ceased, but for a time (as long as a patient has oxygen such as is the case with a breathing machine), the heart and other organs are still viable. This is when most organ transplants take place.

People can function without the use of their body, but not without their brain – or their thought processes. We live our lives through our thoughts. The brain and the mind are not the same thing, however. The brain houses our mind just as the body houses our soul and spirit.

Whatever your circumstance, you control your reaction to it by what you think. What you think is who you are. What you feed into your brain’s data bank will often come out in your actions. 

As I was writing this, the lead article in the New York Times was: The Evil Brain: What Lurks Inside a Killer’s Mind: “As tragedies like Boston and Newtown mount, scientists and criminologists are trying harder than ever to understand the minds behind the crimes.”

The Heart

For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries, deeds of coveting and wickedness, as well as deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. All these evil things proceed from within and defile the man (Mark 7:21-23).

… they are enemies of the cross of Christ, whose end is destruction, whose god is their appetite, and whose glory is in their shame, who set their mind on earthly things (Philippians 3:19).

Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flows the springs of life (Proverbs 4:23). 

Mind and Heart in Sync With God

It is rare to find someone who does not know about Christ – with his mind. It is only those who invite Him into their hearts that become children of God.

Man’s heart has been described as the seat of his emotions. We become children of God by trusting in Jesus with all of our heart. Jesus instructs us to love God with all of our hearts and minds (and souls and strength). Doing that, He will guide our steps. 

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true…noble…just…pure… lovely…of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy – meditate on these things (Philippians 4:8).

Paul addressed this to his brothers – believers in Christ. Instead of “setting our minds on earthly things,” we should “think on these things” (in most versions). Other translations render this as “dwell on these things”(NASB), “focus your thoughts on these things” (Common English Bible), “fill your minds with” (Expanded Bible), “think on, weigh, take account of these things” (fix your minds on them) (Amplified), “let this be the argument of your thoughts” (Knox).

Similarly, other versions translate “whatever things are…” as:

True – all translations

Noble – honorable, respectable, lofty, worthy of reverence

Just – right, virtuous, moral

Pure – genuine, undefiled

Lovely – and lovable, whatever can be loved, pleasing

Good report – is well thought of, commendable, admirable, good repute

Virtue – excellence of character, excellent

Praiseworthy – worth giving thanks for, worthy of praise

Oswald Chambers said, “All Christians have the spirit of Christ, but not all Christians have the mind of Christ,” Chambers calls Matthew 6:19-21 “the depository of thought,” asking, “Where do we make our depository of thinking? What do we brood on most, the blessings of God, or God Himself?” See Romans 12:2; 1 Corinthians 2:16; 2 Corinthians 10:5; Philippians 2:5-8.

If we do not practice intentional thinking, our minds will wander and be open to Satan’s urging to ponder thoughts that are not pleasing to God. When we “think on these things,” we can keep godly thoughts close and shut Satan’s thoughts out. You draw near to God through your thoughts. He promises to draw near to you when you do.

You live by the choices you make. You choose with your thoughts.

The following, attributed to many people including Ralph Waldo Emerson and Lao Tzu, says it well, “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

© Stephanie B. Blake

June 2013

Download Think on these Things

One Focus Blog

Reboot

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I am not high-tech savvy, but I have discovered one thing. Rebooting solves a lot of problems. When your computer or e-reader is frozen, when the electronic camera on either doesn’t work or if an accessory plugged into your device decides to stop functioning, reboot.

Camera(132)I have read that rebooting becomes necessary when your computer develops system problems because of running into an endless program loop or your internet connection breaks down. Shutting off your computer and restarting it can stop the loop or repair the connection.

Life is like that as well. Sometimes we allow negativity to loop over and over in our minds until we become non-productive.

As I travel, I often visit with someone undergoing a problem and they are often frozen in that endless loop of negative thinking. Sometimes he can’t see a light ahead because present circumstances are so dire. Often she can’t forgive herself for something she has done. Maybe he believes his life is useless because he had not been able to accomplish his dreams. She may tell me how her parents, husband, co-workers give her such negative input that she believes that she has nothing to contribute to her family or her job.

It may be hard to believe, but these conversations are with Christians – people who should know better. It is Satan that wants us to believe the negatives in that endless program loop and be incapable of stopping the loop and repairing the connection.

I listen with a heavy heart to these conversations, pray about any advice God may have for them and without exception have told them that what they need is to go back to the place where they met God in the first place and remember the joy they encountered when they first met Jesus and made Him Lord of their lives. Sin can for a time disturb our connection with God. It is up to us to recognize it and ask Him to restore the joy we once knew. We often need to reboot.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me (Psalm 51:12 NIV).

One Focus Blog

Door Jam

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Occasionally my husband has been asked to teach a Bible study at the United Nations in Vienna, Austria. As might be expected, the facility is very secure. It takes special permission to get in. There are security guards when you leave.

450px-Revolving_Door-1After he finished one day, I followed him out through the revolving door. Revolving doors are comprised of three or four panels. I think this one had four. My mistake was that I followed him into the same panel. The spacing in these revolving door panels must have been designed for just one person. I should have known that since the security is so tight. I barely fit behind him.

Unfortunately, my big bag did not fit. I was able to get out of the building myself, but my purse was hung in the revolving door. You can imagine my chagrin at having to make my husband wait for me while I asked a guard for help. The guard tried unsuccessfully to retrieve my purse from the inside. He finally had to go to the control room and ask the engineer to release the control on the door. Then he reached in, got my purse and told me to come back through and retrieve it.

I made an embarrassing mistake, but I got over it. I was much more fortunate than 492 people who perished in flames in a 1942 fire in the Cocoanut Grove, a popular night club in Boston, Massachusetts. One of the reasons for the large number of deaths was the single revolving door at the entrance. As the panicked mob attempted to use the door to escape, it became jammed, trapping many of them between the door and the crowd pushing toward it.

Jesus is the Door to Heaven. There is no entrance except through Him. There is no possibility of a door jam because He greets us one by one as we come to Him in faith.

If we don’t go through the Door, we would spend eternity in everlasting flames. When the end of time has come, there will be no need for security. There will be gates of splendor but they will never be closed.

And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, made ready as a bride adorned for her husband….It had a great and high wall, with twelve gates…In the daytime (for there will be no night there) its gates will never be closed; and they will bring the glory and the honor of the nations into it; and nothing unclean, and no one who practices abomination and lying, shall ever come into it, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life (Revelation 21:2,12, 25).

One Focus Blog

Ladies and Gentlemen

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The British television series Downton Abbey has been an overwhelming and surprising success. Not only is it extremely popular in England and America, but it is also one of the most viewed exports in Australia, Norway, Belgium, Israel and Iceland and is a hit in Sweden, South Korea, the Middle East and many other countries. The writer and actors of this series have been blown away by the response.

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Richard Munckton from Windsor, Melbourne, Australia posted to Flicker

The New York Times described Downton Abbey as a “British dramedy of manners.” Could it be that one of the reasons for its popularity is the refreshing reappearing of good old-fashioned manners – something that has become rather scarce in this day and age?

I know I appreciate it when manners are practiced – when men hold open a door for a woman, when children say “please” and “thank you.” Unfortunately, because it is not as common as it used to be, when someone is practicing good manners, they stand out.

Speeches and formal announcements still begin with Ladies and Gentlemen – a greeting considerably more distinguished than Women and Men. When a man is called a true gentleman that is meant as a compliment. When a woman is referred to as a lady, her gentle characteristics are recognized. Not every woman is a lady, nor is every man a gentleman.

Ladies and gentleman are people of character. Every young female is a girl and every adult female is a woman, but it takes effort to be a lady. Every young male is a boy and every adult male is a man, but it takes work to be a gentleman.

God wants His sons and daughters to be people of good, gentle character. He can even take people with very rough, crude backgrounds and transform them into ladies and gentlemen.

Iris Blue’s testimony is a wonderful example of what God can do. She was a very rebellious young person, ran away from home, got involved in drugs and was sentenced to eight years in prison on armed robbery charges. Her attitude in prison was so bad that she had to serve an even longer sentence. After leaving prison, she continued on her path of rebellion until a young man told her about Jesus Christ and how He loved her. She responded to His love and her testimony is that she “knelt down a tramp and stood up a lady.”

God’s design for Iris was to transform her so she could share HIs love with others, which she does.

True manners are not pretentious. Ladies and gentleman practice manners because they are considerate of others and have a gentle spirit. That is how we should represent our Father. It is part of the fruit of His Spirit.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control (Galatians 5:23). Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near (Philippians 4:5 NAS).

One Focus Blog

Poisonous Plants, Protection and Prayer

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800px-Red_Raspberry_5_leavesLike a lot of other people, I am extremely allergic to poison ivy, poison oak and poison sumac. I have done a lot of research on how to recognize these lovely plants. That is actually harder than it seems. Sometimes the recognition comes when I am in the midst of a patch of it (or after I have swung on the vine). Working in it sometimes cannot be avoided. What I try to avoid is the terrible consequences of not working wisely in it. Forewarned is forearmed.

There are certain types of ivy I would like to cultivate. Although some consider English ivy a noxious plant, overtaking everything, I do like the fact that it looks good, seems to like the shade and will not create a rash like its poisonous cousin.

One of the disturbing things about the poisonous varieties is that they imitate the plants around them – making me a little nervous about every plant I come in contact with. The leaves of three – leave them be rule does help, but the leaves may be pointed, oblong or round. Sumac does not follow the leaves of three rule. I must remember to watch out for a single leaf at the end of a long row of innocent looking leaves on a branch. And there is always the possibility that one of the leaves in the configuration has fallen off – so there might be two leaves in the cluster of three or the single leaf at the end of the sumac branch has disappeared. So, my answer is to always be cautious and protect myself as much as possible.

Protection involves extra clothing – 2 layers of long sleeves and 2 layers of long trousers. I also put on two sets of gloves just to be sure. I lather up with Ivy Block, which is supposed to prevent oils from getting on to my skin. When I finish, I use something to wash off any oils that might have come through the two layers of clothing and the Ivy Block. Somehow, even after all these precautions, I still get the rash and have to wait out the two to three weeks for it to dry up and disappear.

The offending oil on the poisonous plants is not obvious. The leaves don’t always shine. The experts say the oil is still there even after the plant is dead. Working in an area where poison ivy is plentiful takes all the courage I can muster, but most of the time I think the results are worth the effort.

Working around these poisonous plants make me think of life as a Christian in a worldly society. If the Christian’s life is to have any influence on the world, he must be willing to work in the midst of some fairly unpleasant circumstances. Even when one’s standards are according to God’s word, just setting out in business, or shopping or traveling or any contact with others opens the possibility of being exposed to some poisonous influences. Just as the English ivy might grow next to the poison ivy or the poison sumac resembles a harmless tree, it is not always possible to prevent all negative influences from coming into your life.

Living life as a Christian hermit is not the answer. Fighting against those negative influences is the answer: by prevention (being so close to God you learn to recognize the evil), by protection (arming yourself with the resources the Holy Spirit has made available) and prayer (asking God to help you through the forest of good and bad). Living the Christian life is hard, but it is worth the effort.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world…I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one (John 16:33, 17:14-15).

One Focus Blog

When Construction is Done

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National Construction

I travel quite a bit in Europe. There are cities I return to time and again and notice construction everywhere. Road construction, new skyscrapers, remodeling – you name it.

Camera(87)Even though it sometimes makes getting to my destination more difficult (construction crews slow traffic down, roads are rerouted, sidewalks are blocked because of building cranes, etc.), I am thrilled to see construction in these cities I have come to love. It speaks of prosperity and growth.

Much of this construction has been possible because of the investment by the European Union. The EU invests, rightly so, because the pay off will benefit all of Europe. Where there is construction, there is progress. Inconveniences experienced during the period of construction will be worth it.

DSC06653I have watched my husband do remodeling and construction work on our home. Skill and patience is required for the process can be very labor intensive. When construction is completed, not only is there a great feeling of accomplishment, we are able to enjoy the benefits of the completed project.

Ruth Bell Graham, driving through an area where construction had finally been completed, came upon a sign – “End of Construction. Thank you for your patience.” She told her husband, Billy, she wanted that inscription on her gravestone. And so it is.

When I am able to return to the European cities where I have observed construction and when my husband completes a building project, I take great pleasure in the result. The projects were worth the wait and the investment of time and money.

Believers in Christ can only glorify God when we yield ourselves to His patient construction work. He does it all. His investment includes our creation, our salvation through Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit working in and through us.

God continues working with us until He has completed the goal He had in mind. Certainly, we must try His patience during the process. We should thank Him for His long-suffering toward us. When the work is complete, He will call us home – just as He did Ruth Bell Graham.

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The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9). He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ (Philippians 1:6). For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure (Philippians 2:13).

One Focus Blog

When Killing Is Necessary

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I love my home state of Texas. It is a land of plenty with an amazing array of beautiful landscapes and a large variety of wildlife. That includes snakes – lots of them. I do not love snakes.

In the years I have lived in Texas, I have encountered all four major poisonous varieties of snakes indigenous to our state: rattlesnakes, coral snakes, copperheads and water moccasins.

When our sons were young, we lived in a city that was also home to all four of these snakes. Within a block of our home was a lake. One of the largest water moccasins I have ever seen was found in front of our house. He was dead by the time I discovered him. He had been run over by a car.

While I was mowing one day, I encountered a coral snake in our back yard. Both the snake and our dog were headed for the shaded area underneath our deck. Before our pet saw him, I was able to kill the snake by running over it several times with the lawn mower.

Our sons were taught by their Boy Scout leader to watch for beds of rattlesnakes in the woods behind our house. I warned them to never pick up a stick without checking to make sure it was not a snake. I didn’t take my own advice. I was cleaning around the base of a tree one day and the stick I was about to pick up moved. Thankfully, I had a hoe in my hand and was able to kill the baby rattlesnake.

We no longer live in that city and my sons are grown now with children of their own, but they must continue to heed my warning about snakes. In the area where we live now, I am still finding snakes. I found a dead one by a wood stack in our back yard. We are also clearing a piece of land outside of town and I have encountered two copperheads there. Both were hidden underneath a pile of leaves I was raking.

800px-Juvenile_copperhead_snakeI had been working the better part of the day and was close to quitting when I saw the first one. It was motionless but very much alive. I had my wits about me enough to say a prayer. “Lord, do I leave it and go home or should I kill it?” Immediately, I heard Him say,  “If you leave him, he will be here when you get back.” I didn’t want to see him again, so I killed him with the shovel I had close by. Several days later, I uncovered the other one and didn’t have to ask that time. I killed him too.

I have wondered about the way the Lord answered my question. Instead of saying, “leave him,” or “kill him,” He said, “If you leave him, he will be here when you get back.”

I believe it is like that with sin in our lives. We shouldn’t just ignore temptations and walk away – imagining they will not continue to hang around. We must be just as diligent to get rid of sin as soon as it rears its ugly head as I was with those snakes.

In each case, when I encountered a snake, God had provided a tool for me to use to kill it. He has given us the sword of the Spirit, which is His word, to confront temptation and sin. Just as Jesus responded to Satan with the Word of God when He was tempted in the wilderness, so should we.

John Owen, who wrote a little book called Mortification of Sin in Believers (based on Romans 8:13), put it this way: “Be killing sin or it will be killing you.”

for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live (Romans 8:13).